- I really thrive on a couple of long walks (1-3 hours) a week.
- I like to take care of administrivia in the morning and creative work in the afternoon.
- Ideally, I do the hard-core creative work 3 (no more than 4) days a week.
- I love not having to set an alarm clock. I like to go to bed between 10 and 11 pm and wake up on my own between 7 am and 8 am.
- I'm done with my work "energies" between 6 pm and 7 pm at night.
Right now, I can mostly organize my days this way. I try to imagine applying these same learned "rules" to my life when I return to DC....and I run into a brick wall of resistance.
"But what about work?!?"
"What about making money?!?"
"You can't make enough money only seeing clients 3 afternoons a week!!"
"What about your clients who need to see you in the morning?!?"
And then I get panicky and/or depressed. It feels like I can choose to be economically viable or I can take care of myself but I can't do both.
While walking to the bus stop yesterday, a thought came un-bidden into my mind:
Can you trust?
Can you choose to believe that it is possible to both take care of yourself and feed yourself?
Can you operate "as if" it is true? Go ahead and set up your schedule and just...let things happen?
Because you know that's usually what it takes to make something new happen.....
And the answer is "hmmmmmm........".
(See what happens when you take a sabbatical? Subversive thoughts start taking over your mind!)
Awesome! I love this, as I, too, need to take much time with self-care, and other outlets (I am an MS patient, as well as an LMT). It is a challenge to Know that you can do it on your own terms, when everyone around you wants to make sure you are aware of the "reality" around you. I would much rather laugh at their "reality", but as you say, subversive thoughts can run amok, lol. =)
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Breathe JOY!
Andrea
"Reality" -- whatever that is -- is usually far more flexible than we allow ourselves to believe.
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