Multiple Choice: Who's Really Your Client?

A man calls you. He wants to set up weekly massage appointments for his 85-year-old mother, who lives in a nursing home. The son will be paying you and has strong opinions about the best massage for his mom; specifically, he firmly believes in the value of deep tissue and insists that you do deep tissue on his mother.

Unless his mother is unusually robust for an 85-year-old who lives in a nursing home, deep tissue would be contraindicated. Do you tell the son that? Do you agree with the son and then do what you professionally deem best? Do you ask the mother to explain it to her son?

Who are you responsible to? The mother is receiving the massage but the son has hired you and is paying you. Who is your client? Money or massage? What trumps – the business or the work? 
 

Your client is not the person paying you. It's the person receiving the work. Your professional obligations are always to the body and spirit under your hands.

What do you say to the son and his deep-tissue insistence? Arguing is probably not going to be productive. About all you can say is “I'll give your mom the best care I can and use my best professional judgment.”

And if the son insists? You may engage him in a conversation about why he believes deep tissue is best. Talk a bit about the physiological differences between the average adult and an older adult.

But in the end if the price of working on a client is working outside professional boundaries, the answer has to be “no”, no matter how good the money.